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I can't sleep. This tends to happen when you spend a week sleeping most of the day, and then staying up until the wee hours of the morning. I'm glad that Curtis got me this 'silent' kybard, cause otherwise I'd be waking him up, and that wouldn't be fun.
It's 5:20. I need to 'get up' at 7:30 to meet my group at 8:30 to prepare for a presetation at 9:00. Whee.
Last night, Zack had his friend Carly come over -- we've managed to get her into Magic, but it doesn't take a rocket scientist to know that she was there mostly because he's leaving, or something. They used to be Together, so they
are more than 'just friends,' as I imagine (now) most couples tend to be.
That's funny, actually, because not but two years ago, I didn't think people COULD break up and still be friends. Now it seems I expect it.
Claire and I chatted this evening. It was really good, I think. -smiles- Once, not too long ago, I told her that there had never been a time when I didn't feel better for having talked with her. She's still got a flawless track record. We talked about Us, the way we were... She was afraid she may be dredging up painful memories, but quite contrary, I like looking back on what we had. I don't regret wat we had, and all the memories I have of her are good ones.
Claire taught me alot, in our relationship, sure, but also in our breakup. She still means alot to me -- Istill feel the same deep affection for her as I ever have, even if I am over the whole 'Us' thing. It took me time and anguish, but... -smiles- Anyways, we had a good chat.
I listened to 'Pianoforte' this morning, a CD I burned for her once, after our breakup. I think it was a gift for her Birthday or something, but it may have just been a random gift. I do those, occasionally. I couldn't sleep, ad so at 4am, I got up and grabbed my CD player, and remembering that it was supposed to be motly instrumentals, and that i'd thought it too soft to drive to, I put it in. And most of it is instrumentals -- songs which I simply adore the sound of, like Terra's Theme from Final Fantasy 6, or the orchestrated/remixed version of the Ghost House from Super Mario World. Yeah, I'm a dork. But there were a few songs with words in there, which kind of make me smile and shake my head at myself. "One More Time" by Queensryche and "I Remember" by Stabbing Westward... I was always trying to tell her something with my CDs... -smiles- I don't think I've burned a CD that really tried to say something in a while.
I've noticed, in this and other things, that I'm often afraid of going unnoticed. I want to let people know I'm here, and I get discouraged when I feel no one takes notice... It can be seen in alot of what I do, really... ^_^;;
I think I had a point, but I'm not sure what it was. I'm happy, I think. No, no thinking involved. ^_^;; I'm happy. I have good friends. You all mean alot to me. And stuff.
I'm not any tired now than when I started this. In fact, I think I'm more awake. I'm going to hate this week.
[edit 6:00] Ha, 'Now And Then,' by Blackmore's Night is on 'Pianoforte.' Yeah, I had something to say. In essence, the message still holds, especially that one.
Being forgotten, even more than being abandoned, I think, is one of my greatest fears.
It's 5:20. I need to 'get up' at 7:30 to meet my group at 8:30 to prepare for a presetation at 9:00. Whee.
Last night, Zack had his friend Carly come over -- we've managed to get her into Magic, but it doesn't take a rocket scientist to know that she was there mostly because he's leaving, or something. They used to be Together, so they
are more than 'just friends,' as I imagine (now) most couples tend to be.
That's funny, actually, because not but two years ago, I didn't think people COULD break up and still be friends. Now it seems I expect it.
Claire and I chatted this evening. It was really good, I think. -smiles- Once, not too long ago, I told her that there had never been a time when I didn't feel better for having talked with her. She's still got a flawless track record. We talked about Us, the way we were... She was afraid she may be dredging up painful memories, but quite contrary, I like looking back on what we had. I don't regret wat we had, and all the memories I have of her are good ones.
Claire taught me alot, in our relationship, sure, but also in our breakup. She still means alot to me -- Istill feel the same deep affection for her as I ever have, even if I am over the whole 'Us' thing. It took me time and anguish, but... -smiles- Anyways, we had a good chat.
I listened to 'Pianoforte' this morning, a CD I burned for her once, after our breakup. I think it was a gift for her Birthday or something, but it may have just been a random gift. I do those, occasionally. I couldn't sleep, ad so at 4am, I got up and grabbed my CD player, and remembering that it was supposed to be motly instrumentals, and that i'd thought it too soft to drive to, I put it in. And most of it is instrumentals -- songs which I simply adore the sound of, like Terra's Theme from Final Fantasy 6, or the orchestrated/remixed version of the Ghost House from Super Mario World. Yeah, I'm a dork. But there were a few songs with words in there, which kind of make me smile and shake my head at myself. "One More Time" by Queensryche and "I Remember" by Stabbing Westward... I was always trying to tell her something with my CDs... -smiles- I don't think I've burned a CD that really tried to say something in a while.
I've noticed, in this and other things, that I'm often afraid of going unnoticed. I want to let people know I'm here, and I get discouraged when I feel no one takes notice... It can be seen in alot of what I do, really... ^_^;;
I think I had a point, but I'm not sure what it was. I'm happy, I think. No, no thinking involved. ^_^;; I'm happy. I have good friends. You all mean alot to me. And stuff.
I'm not any tired now than when I started this. In fact, I think I'm more awake. I'm going to hate this week.
[edit 6:00] Ha, 'Now And Then,' by Blackmore's Night is on 'Pianoforte.' Yeah, I had something to say. In essence, the message still holds, especially that one.
Being forgotten, even more than being abandoned, I think, is one of my greatest fears.
