That's because you have a decent level of standards. When you stop respecting yourself it's easier to do things with people that you know you're better than. The only problem is how long it takes to get your self-respect back. Trust me.
A story: a couple years ago, I took a trip down to visit my "Cousin" Abe (actually, the widower of my paternal grandfather's cousin). He's a cool guy. He served in the Merchant Marine and started a Marxist reading group on board the ship, invented a machine for sewing buttons on more efficiently, and now teaches Tai Chi. But that's not what the story's about.
Anyway, so we were talking, and he mentioned that, you know, at his age, he doesn't really think about sex anymore. And that it's great! He has plenty of time to think about and do other stuff now.
So, I guess... this sort of thing is only as much of a problem as you make it. I don't know that I'd agree that it's a matter of self-respect, really, unless you've got drunk women throwing themselves at you all the time, or something. It's more a matter of making choices about what is going to be prominent in your life. If your approach to dating is at variance with the mainstream, and you've got pretty specific constraints on what you're looking for (devout Catholic, wants a big family, etc.), then, yeah, an occupational hazard is going to be that that sort of thing is more difficult to find. If *all* you cared about was making out, well, you could probably do that more efficiently. But that's not really the point.
Heh. Yes, I have -- and I still do -- but I've basically decided they just amount to concentrated, accelerated rejection. I get more of an ego boost just hanging out with various circles of friends, and I might argue I have about as much chance finding a Someone that way as through online match-making.
yeah I figured that would be my experience, hence I never tried. I pride myself in my ability to spot bullshit advertising and companies that feed on the insecurities of consumers, but they make tempting promises. I guess thats the appeal of pyramid schemes.
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2008-03-23 05:03 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-03-23 08:13 pm (UTC)Anyway, so we were talking, and he mentioned that, you know, at his age, he doesn't really think about sex anymore. And that it's great! He has plenty of time to think about and do other stuff now.
So, I guess... this sort of thing is only as much of a problem as you make it. I don't know that I'd agree that it's a matter of self-respect, really, unless you've got drunk women throwing themselves at you all the time, or something. It's more a matter of making choices about what is going to be prominent in your life. If your approach to dating is at variance with the mainstream, and you've got pretty specific constraints on what you're looking for (devout Catholic, wants a big family, etc.), then, yeah, an occupational hazard is going to be that that sort of thing is more difficult to find. If *all* you cared about was making out, well, you could probably do that more efficiently. But that's not really the point.
no subject
Date: 2008-03-29 08:12 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-03-30 03:12 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-03-30 03:34 pm (UTC)