There's a healthy attitude...

[jackofallgeeks]

I've only read This First Page, but what bothers me more than anything else is where she says, "Eventually I grew bored with Patrick -- we had no interests in common -- and after 15 years of marriage, we divorced amicably." Emphasis mine.

Comments

[otakulk.livejournal.com]

Uhm, why were you on that page? :D

[jackofallgeeks.livejournal.com]

:-p What can I say? I was bored at work.

Mawwaige

[xenu.livejournal.com]

Do you think it's better to stay married if you no longer love that person?

Re: Mawwaige

[jackofallgeeks.livejournal.com]

This is question looks to be far more simple than it really is. It's not just asking what I think of divorce, it's asking first what I think of marriage and, even deeper than that, what I think of "in love." What do you mean, "you no longer love them." I get angry with my brothers, but that doesn't mean I don't love them. My sisters often annoy me, but that doesn't mean I don't love them. My friends make some really stupid choices, but that doesn't mean I don't love them. What do you mean by "in love"? Are you talking about those warm-fuzzies that you get when a relationship is fresh? Those are often gone after the first couple weeks of a relationship, even if they come and go several times over it's course. What about that feeling that washes over you when you see her laying asleep next to you and you think, "she's so beautiful like that?" What about that firm resolve you have to stick by a person and share their joy and help with their strive and just be there for them? Can you love someone who doesn't love you back?

What it boils down to, I guess, is that I think there are much deeper issues in place long before you can even get to the point of 'not loving' someone anymore. What it boils down to is that I think people need to rethink why it is they enter into a relationship, and why a relationship is worth maintaining, and why a relationship is worth fighting for when the world sucks. It boils down to the fact that "getting bored" with your spouse speaks of an attitude about relationships and life in general which is just... empty.

At least, that's as good as I can come up with at 12:30 on a Sunday night.

Ah, but Andrew

[xenu.livejournal.com]

I'm not talking about the warm-fuzzies. I'm not talking about Hollywood. I'm talking about when you're best friends and there's that extra thing; I know it exists as I've felt it and it never went away with that person, to this day. And no, not with Louis.