...would smell as sweet.
Oct. 13th, 2005 09:24 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
I've a lot on my mind tonight.
Classes are going. I have one project that I can't figure out -- it's written in Scheme, a language I don't really know yet, and while I know how it SHOULD be working , I don't know why it's giving me these errors, nor do I know how to fix them. And the professor isn't getting back to me.
Other little school-type things, like worrying about whether I'm taking the courses I should be, if i'm missing things I should have or if I'm not planning correctly for what I'll need to take. Those don't bother me too much. Some social concerns -- mostly that I seem more often than not holed up in my apartment, and I'm afraid I'm missing significan social events with the other students. I'm not intentionally skipping out on things I know are going on, but i'm afraid there are things I don't know about, and the lack of interpersonal interaction just gets to me sometimes. That doesn't bother me too much, either.
The Internet's been mostly quiet these past few days -- no emails, no comments, no LJ posts (and most of you kmow I'm exagerating when i say 'no'). That bugs me a little bit too, but life happens.
What bugs me a more is that Tessa, the girl I met who I was kind of fond of, just sent me a message to the tune of: "You're a swell guy and I wish you well, but i've met someone else and we've really hit it off, so this will probably be the last you hear of me." and that's a little bit disappointing, both in the particulars and the generalities it reflects. "You're a great guy, for someone else," is my life story.
And coupled with that is Things with Meghan. And I hesitate to voice too many particulars, because she can read this if she so chooses, but... She's a nice girl, and I count her as a friend, and as she said (though I may have coined the phrase), she lets me "Check off all the boxes," but... I still have reservations. Something's holding me back. And it's rather stupid, really, because every now and them (like when she said such Kind Words to me, Dawn) I think to myself, "I'd like for her to be the one." But there are all these things arguing in my head, and I don't know which ones are valid points and which aren't, and which could develop into problems and which couldn't, and I don't know if I'm even aware of all the things holding me back. But...
Anyways, it's been a long day. It's been a long week. I think i'm going to make up some tea, maybe read a book or play a game, and then crawl in bed. I don't want to get up for classes in the morning.
Classes are going. I have one project that I can't figure out -- it's written in Scheme, a language I don't really know yet, and while I know how it SHOULD be working , I don't know why it's giving me these errors, nor do I know how to fix them. And the professor isn't getting back to me.
Other little school-type things, like worrying about whether I'm taking the courses I should be, if i'm missing things I should have or if I'm not planning correctly for what I'll need to take. Those don't bother me too much. Some social concerns -- mostly that I seem more often than not holed up in my apartment, and I'm afraid I'm missing significan social events with the other students. I'm not intentionally skipping out on things I know are going on, but i'm afraid there are things I don't know about, and the lack of interpersonal interaction just gets to me sometimes. That doesn't bother me too much, either.
The Internet's been mostly quiet these past few days -- no emails, no comments, no LJ posts (and most of you kmow I'm exagerating when i say 'no'). That bugs me a little bit too, but life happens.
What bugs me a more is that Tessa, the girl I met who I was kind of fond of, just sent me a message to the tune of: "You're a swell guy and I wish you well, but i've met someone else and we've really hit it off, so this will probably be the last you hear of me." and that's a little bit disappointing, both in the particulars and the generalities it reflects. "You're a great guy, for someone else," is my life story.
And coupled with that is Things with Meghan. And I hesitate to voice too many particulars, because she can read this if she so chooses, but... She's a nice girl, and I count her as a friend, and as she said (though I may have coined the phrase), she lets me "Check off all the boxes," but... I still have reservations. Something's holding me back. And it's rather stupid, really, because every now and them (like when she said such Kind Words to me, Dawn) I think to myself, "I'd like for her to be the one." But there are all these things arguing in my head, and I don't know which ones are valid points and which aren't, and which could develop into problems and which couldn't, and I don't know if I'm even aware of all the things holding me back. But...
Anyways, it's been a long day. It's been a long week. I think i'm going to make up some tea, maybe read a book or play a game, and then crawl in bed. I don't want to get up for classes in the morning.
no subject
Date: 2005-10-14 02:42 pm (UTC)Hey! I sent you messages on the game board after your post about games dying. You ignored me! *pouts*
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Date: 2005-10-14 04:29 pm (UTC)I'm guilty of being quiet recently, too.
:p
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Date: 2005-10-15 08:08 pm (UTC)