![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
jackofallgeeksSo, I here I sit at home, not in my apartment, and I thought that I might update a little but, seeing as I haven't updated in a while.
I think it was about a week ago or so when my buddy Sarah said "My boyfriend is reminding me of you!" This turned out to be a bad thing, as she meant he was talking about settling down and having a family, but he wanted a woman like his mother who, he claims, keeps house, raises children, works full time, and still remains sane. Sarah, needless to say, didn't feel like she could handle that, and it bothered her.
The reason this is pertinent is that Sarah's point -- he wanted a girl who could Do It All -- isn't what I want. That is, I often find myself looking at relationships in a rather utilitarian way; in terms of how I can be useful to her. In the context of marriage, it boils down to "I will work so that she doesn't have to." It's a necessary evil, and a 'reason' for someone to marry me. I mean, if I get loving companionship and fulfillment of my life-long dream of havnig a family, what does she get? -laughs- And I sit here and recognize how ridiculous it is -- after all, doesn't she get loving companionship, too? -- that's the way I think about it at times. I really should stop that.
I spent Tuesday evening with Anastasiya; she got out of class at about 5:00, and we just went out and got dinner. We also went out to Barnes & Noble, which was just a Bad Idea. We each left $50 poor-er, but with good books! There's a kind of "pocket classics" hardback series she showed me, and I got "Dracula," "Frankenstein," "Pride and Prejudice"," "The Illiad," "The Odyssey," "Alice in Wonderland," and "The Portrait of Dorian Grey", all of which I hope to read within the year. Which means really cracking down on my casual reading each day. I also picked up "House of Leaves." In part, I blame Leslie, who posted about the book a while ago. I had a friend who was reading it a year ago or so, but it seems that no one I've spoken to has formed a readily-articulated opinion of the book. I'm mostly interested in reading the book to see if I can form an opinion on it. Plus, Leslie says it's kinda creepy, and if it scares Leslie...
Yesterday was spent with Amber, watching the Buffy TV Series, Second Season. Or rather, I watched while she slept on the couch, cause she was sick. In the back of my mind, I want to say there was something interesting I was going to say here, but I can't really recall what it was...
Today is my little sister Elizabeth's birthday. She's ten years old, which I find oddly striking. The girl was born in 1995. I was about twelve years old. I wasn't even in Highschool yet, we were living in Virginia Beach. It seems so long ago, but not very long at all. -laughs- Similarly, she seems to be growing into her own person, but she's still really a kid. -laughs- Dad's birthday is t'morrow, and I think that makes him... forty-six? Yeah, because until Beth is 13, the sum of his age is her age. And, oddly, after that their sums will be the same, I think... Emily turns four on Monday. Which means she was never alive in the 1900s.
On Saturday I fly out to California to visit the Naval Postgraduate School. I'll be staying in the apartment of two guys who are current students, along with another guy who was selected along with me. One will get the couch, the other a mattress on the floor -- I'm hoping for the couch. I'm really looking forward to getting out on a plane again. I think it's been nearly two years since I flew, and I rather miss it. It'll be good to travel again.
I think it was about a week ago or so when my buddy Sarah said "My boyfriend is reminding me of you!" This turned out to be a bad thing, as she meant he was talking about settling down and having a family, but he wanted a woman like his mother who, he claims, keeps house, raises children, works full time, and still remains sane. Sarah, needless to say, didn't feel like she could handle that, and it bothered her.
The reason this is pertinent is that Sarah's point -- he wanted a girl who could Do It All -- isn't what I want. That is, I often find myself looking at relationships in a rather utilitarian way; in terms of how I can be useful to her. In the context of marriage, it boils down to "I will work so that she doesn't have to." It's a necessary evil, and a 'reason' for someone to marry me. I mean, if I get loving companionship and fulfillment of my life-long dream of havnig a family, what does she get? -laughs- And I sit here and recognize how ridiculous it is -- after all, doesn't she get loving companionship, too? -- that's the way I think about it at times. I really should stop that.
I spent Tuesday evening with Anastasiya; she got out of class at about 5:00, and we just went out and got dinner. We also went out to Barnes & Noble, which was just a Bad Idea. We each left $50 poor-er, but with good books! There's a kind of "pocket classics" hardback series she showed me, and I got "Dracula," "Frankenstein," "Pride and Prejudice"," "The Illiad," "The Odyssey," "Alice in Wonderland," and "The Portrait of Dorian Grey", all of which I hope to read within the year. Which means really cracking down on my casual reading each day. I also picked up "House of Leaves." In part, I blame Leslie, who posted about the book a while ago. I had a friend who was reading it a year ago or so, but it seems that no one I've spoken to has formed a readily-articulated opinion of the book. I'm mostly interested in reading the book to see if I can form an opinion on it. Plus, Leslie says it's kinda creepy, and if it scares Leslie...
Yesterday was spent with Amber, watching the Buffy TV Series, Second Season. Or rather, I watched while she slept on the couch, cause she was sick. In the back of my mind, I want to say there was something interesting I was going to say here, but I can't really recall what it was...
Today is my little sister Elizabeth's birthday. She's ten years old, which I find oddly striking. The girl was born in 1995. I was about twelve years old. I wasn't even in Highschool yet, we were living in Virginia Beach. It seems so long ago, but not very long at all. -laughs- Similarly, she seems to be growing into her own person, but she's still really a kid. -laughs- Dad's birthday is t'morrow, and I think that makes him... forty-six? Yeah, because until Beth is 13, the sum of his age is her age. And, oddly, after that their sums will be the same, I think... Emily turns four on Monday. Which means she was never alive in the 1900s.
On Saturday I fly out to California to visit the Naval Postgraduate School. I'll be staying in the apartment of two guys who are current students, along with another guy who was selected along with me. One will get the couch, the other a mattress on the floor -- I'm hoping for the couch. I'm really looking forward to getting out on a plane again. I think it's been nearly two years since I flew, and I rather miss it. It'll be good to travel again.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2005-03-04 01:05 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-03-04 02:31 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-03-04 04:40 am (UTC)I love you, Mel.
About how far from Monterey do you live?
no subject
Date: 2005-03-04 08:41 am (UTC)sadness. you know, it wouldn't even be an issue if california was a short state. it just... goes on and on and ON. i know. i've taken the greyhound almost the entire length. guh. :p
no subject
Date: 2005-03-04 05:26 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-03-04 08:43 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-03-04 04:41 am (UTC)You know, you're right! Spike rocks in so many ways! But I'll have to get on that another time...
no subject
Date: 2005-03-04 04:50 pm (UTC)House of Leaves doesn't scare me, it just sort of...unnerves me. The bit about the measurements. So far. It might scare me later. Otherwise, I'm just sort of dubious about how artsy it is. Hopefully it won't let me down and make me light it on fire...'cause it's not my own personal copy, it's the store's, and burning the store's book would be, um, bad.
COME SEE ME!
no subject
Date: 2005-03-04 05:24 pm (UTC)Have I ever told you that one of the things I love about you is how horridly literary you are? I really admire it. In my defense, though, I didn't have the book right there, and I'd only just got it, and come on -- a portrait *is* a picture...
And, OK, I might submit that 'unnerve' and 'scare' might, in most cases, be interchangeable. But I'll let you have this one.
And, yes, plans are in the works for me to be down there the evening of the 11th through to the evening of the 12th, or so. There will be raw fish, old video games and, God willing, a computerized exorcism or two.