Every silver lining...

I want you to be happy.
But I want to be happy, too.

I don't like how, recently, I can't appreciate the joy my friends have found. I can't stand it, in fact. I should be really happy for them, that things are working out.
But instead, more than anything, it just seems to underscore my own current low.
I feel angry and cynical. I think things which make me feel horrid just thinking.

I hope it's just stress.
I hope I can get out of this funk, get back East and be happy, both because I'm there and because my friends have so many things for me to be happy about.
I don't like feeling this way.

In other news, it's about 4am. I've been coding since, uhm, about 10om. It's actually been a lot of fun; mostly because I've been getting somewhere. I got my C++ project working, but I borrowed rather heavily from some other sources; I hope that's not a problem, because I don't think I would have fixed my problem if I hadn't found it elsewhere. And my Ada project is nigh-done, here in my lap; I'm just commenting the thing.

So, yeah. Programming's going good.
Which is generally a good thing.
And would be particularly a good thing, if my career meant anything to me beyond a means to an end.

*sigh*
Get this done, and maybe get some sleep before lunch...

(no subject)

I just got a Christmas card from LaGarde/LeCompte with a wedding-invitation-magnet-thing inside.
It made me smile.

Plan of attack

Updated 12.14.2005 10:34
Bumped 12.13.2005 05:45

Done. 07th(Wed): Summary 5

Done. 08th(Thu): Mass, Compilers test, 3600 test, Summary 6, 4600 essay

Done. 09th(Fri): Summary 7, Summary 8

Done. 10th(Sat): Summay 9, Summary 10, Networks Lab

Done. 11th(Sun): Mass

Done. 12th(Mon): C++ Program complete

Done. 13th(Tues): Ada Program complete

Done. 14th(Wed): Networks test, Ada v. Java Paper complete, pack

15th(Thu):Go Home!

Ok... maybe I *can* do this...

Mom:Don't worry, I have faith you'll get it all done in time.
Andrew: Well, good, that makes one of us.
Mom: Yeah, but you also didn't think you would graduate.
Andrew: Hey, there were mitigating factors...!
Mom: -laughs-