So, a bit of news.

So, right now I'm trying to find words to express myself. This time it's a good kind of thing, though; joy, not rage, confounds my tongue. Er, fingers. If I were to post right now, it would look something like:

i got the job i got the job i got the job i got the job i got the job i got the job i got the job i got the job i got the job i got the job i got the job i got the job i got the job i got the job i got the job i got the job i got the job i got the job i got the job i got the job i got the job i got the job i got the job i got the job i got the job i got the job i got the job

And so on. That's just rather childish. So until I can come up with a more cultured way of expressing myself, suffice it to say: I got the job. I'm coming home. I'm happy beyond words.

(no subject)

So. This post is about Meghan.

Most of you will remember Meghan as the second of two girls from Christendom with whom I had a quasi-relationship. Just before coming out to California Suzannah asked to never speak to me again, and just after coming out to California Meghan and I had a falling out. Meghan wanted to date me and while I thought she was a nice enough girl (1) she'd never dated anyone before and I'm not eager to be someone's "first" after learning so much through my own relationships and (2) having a serious relationship of any kind over a 3000 mile gap is rather infeasible, especially for me.

Of course, from there she and I fell into a couple of arguments that kind of sealed the deal, most obviously the bit about her being uncomfortable with the friendships I kept (most of my friends are girls, and I'm very affectionate), but there was also my own concern that Meghan, like many other girls I've met from similar circles, is "too" Catholic for me.

That second bit is really hard for me to describe. My faith is important to me, it's part of how I define myself, and my lack of faith is a failing in my own eyes. At the same time, my whole being is one of rationality, facts, and... While I believe myself to be right, and I believe others to be wrong, objectively, I don't cast people or ideas aside out of hand. I disagree with the majority of my friends on a number of topics, but they all still have valid points and, if nothing else, provide a necessary check in the universe. "All things in moderation, even moderation," perhaps. Willful ignorance of any kind is a high crime in my book. To accept and believe and blindly follow because someone else says a thing is so, or even just something as innocuous as simplifying or "dumbing-down" a topic because you assume that whoever your audience is can't grasp the true scope of the issue... Faith is important to me, but I strongly believe that faith and reason are not opposed, and I'm suspicious of anyone who would try to subvert either one to the other.

That's what I mean when I say "too Catholic." I mean unreasoningly faithful. Faith is a good thing. I wish I had more of it. But to cast aside whole swaths of intellectual material because it treads the line too closely... I don't like that.