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She Has A Girlfriend Now
Mar. 8th, 2002 02:45 amSo, I had dinner with Claire t'night. We talked, which was good, and I caved and told her that Beth was the one I was feeling protective against - that she'd been the one who wanted to glomp her. She wasn't surprised - she kinda giggled and said she figured as much. Then I asked her about Nifer, and things turned, though not in a bad way. Or really a good way. Just, in a way.
You see, she avoided it for the longest time, and so, figuring that she would talk when she was ready, I simply continued explaining my interesting weekend. And then, she said it - she'd had a crush on both Jen and Beth, but had never told them. Never told anyone. ^_^* I'd be lying if I said that wasn't a bit odd to be hearing, though I'd lie further to say it surprised me - in a way, I was waiting for it. I still don't think I know how to take it. I mean, the girl I love likes (or at the very least, has liked) other girls. I feel I've fallen right in the middle of 'Chasing Amy.' Thank God Louis isn't gay. O.o
But seriously, in a way, it made me feel better - that she was with me, not them. I told her I'd like to be her girlfriend, and she liked that - apparently she'd always wanted one. ^_^* I told her I was glad it was me and not some other girl - she seemed to find that flipping hillarious. But even beyond that, I'm happy. I told her that I wanted to have a future with her, and that I really did want a big family, and she accepted it as well as I accepted her. And there's still an 'us.'
One doubt still hovers - I fear that it's a possibility I may only love her because she loves me. I want to love her because, just because. Maybe I will. Maybe I do. Maybe it doesn't matter.
You see, she avoided it for the longest time, and so, figuring that she would talk when she was ready, I simply continued explaining my interesting weekend. And then, she said it - she'd had a crush on both Jen and Beth, but had never told them. Never told anyone. ^_^* I'd be lying if I said that wasn't a bit odd to be hearing, though I'd lie further to say it surprised me - in a way, I was waiting for it. I still don't think I know how to take it. I mean, the girl I love likes (or at the very least, has liked) other girls. I feel I've fallen right in the middle of 'Chasing Amy.' Thank God Louis isn't gay. O.o
But seriously, in a way, it made me feel better - that she was with me, not them. I told her I'd like to be her girlfriend, and she liked that - apparently she'd always wanted one. ^_^* I told her I was glad it was me and not some other girl - she seemed to find that flipping hillarious. But even beyond that, I'm happy. I told her that I wanted to have a future with her, and that I really did want a big family, and she accepted it as well as I accepted her. And there's still an 'us.'
One doubt still hovers - I fear that it's a possibility I may only love her because she loves me. I want to love her because, just because. Maybe I will. Maybe I do. Maybe it doesn't matter.
