John Noble (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
jackofallgeeks) wrote2002-02-15 01:29 pm
jackofallgeeks) wrote2002-02-15 01:29 pm
*Crawls Into A Hole*
Today has thus far generally sucked.
After English, me and Nina were talking and she (half-jokingly?) said she'd always had a low opinon of me. We're friends and all, and we kept talking after than note, but it still does hurt some.
At lunch I wanted to put my head on Lauren's shoulder. I was tried, and think, and lord knows I've been lonely this month...but, of course, you can't just cuddle with your friends. It looks weird, people think things.
This morning I decided I didn't want to go to Tennly tonight with Jack - I'm just not up for it. A guy's got a right to not want to go out, dam it. When I told Jack, he was a bit upset, and tried to convince me to go. When I refused, he kinda laughed and made a remark about how I'm always complaining that I need to get out more. I said that stung and he said, "No, you want to know what stings....?" Then, as we parted ways, he said "Have a miserable day." Jack never says anything mean. Ever. Where I would cuss at someone, Jack's the type who says "God Bless you." He wants to be a priest, and he's a really nice guy. But today he was full of venom. I feel really miserable.
I'm mad, but I donno if I'm mad at him, or me.
Or both.
Work in 1/2 an hour. That's going to suck.
After English, me and Nina were talking and she (half-jokingly?) said she'd always had a low opinon of me. We're friends and all, and we kept talking after than note, but it still does hurt some.
At lunch I wanted to put my head on Lauren's shoulder. I was tried, and think, and lord knows I've been lonely this month...but, of course, you can't just cuddle with your friends. It looks weird, people think things.
This morning I decided I didn't want to go to Tennly tonight with Jack - I'm just not up for it. A guy's got a right to not want to go out, dam it. When I told Jack, he was a bit upset, and tried to convince me to go. When I refused, he kinda laughed and made a remark about how I'm always complaining that I need to get out more. I said that stung and he said, "No, you want to know what stings....?" Then, as we parted ways, he said "Have a miserable day." Jack never says anything mean. Ever. Where I would cuss at someone, Jack's the type who says "God Bless you." He wants to be a priest, and he's a really nice guy. But today he was full of venom. I feel really miserable.
I'm mad, but I donno if I'm mad at him, or me.
Or both.
Work in 1/2 an hour. That's going to suck.
Yes, well....
But... ::shrugs:: There's something there I'm not comfortable with, I guess... ><;; Maybe the fact that I would WANT to cuddle with them is a deterent - ie, anything someone might think wouldn't be so far from the truth...
But I've been thinking, and I suppose I should throw causion to the wind, in this case at least. If people get used to you being a touchy-feely kinda guy, it won't be such a big deal, right?
Riiiiiiight.
I appreciate you're e-hug (if you will), and i'm sure he didn't mean to be such a...not nice word, but I also think I was the major cause of his having a bad day, so...