John Noble (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
jackofallgeeks) wrote2003-02-10 01:58 am
jackofallgeeks) wrote2003-02-10 01:58 am
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Just had a very interesting conversation with a guy about Friends, Sex, Love, and everything inbetween... ^_^;; It was quite... interesting. It's conversations like that which remind me that, though I'm not quite as innocent as I pretend, I want to be.
Just a few quotes and comments, mostly things which I felt said something about me.
A lot of it you probably already know, but the conversation was worth recording -- sadly, like a stupid with which I am, I closed Trillian before saving the IM. Damnable.
Me: "I think a girlfriend should pretty much just be a best friend who lets you kiss her. That's about it."
Anyoneofus: "That sounds like a friend with benefits to me."
Me: "-shrugs- There's little difference, I think. One has a title."
Anyoneofus: "I'm a firm believer in the "you don't shit in your own backyard." You don't want to lose a friend, but eventually you will lose a girlfriend."
Me: "Yeah, that's something I'm afraid of with Claire and I. So far it hasn't happened yet. -phew-"
Me: You shouldn't ever feel forced into or out of a relationship -- it's spposed to be a comfort and a support, not a worry. You know what I mean? You should never be afraid of your relationship. Or something.
Anyoneofus: I just enjoy giving people pleasure. that's what it comes down to, really.
Me: I like giving people support. Mental, material, emotional -- I'm not a big physical-kinda guy, but sometimes it's the best way to express my affection.
Anyoneofus: "There has to be a lot of emotion there. Otherwise I'll just be lured away."
Me: "I'm a big ball of emotion. I'm really just looking for an outlet. In my experience, no one wants my affection."
Me: "When I say 'what gay men do is wrong,' I only mean it the same way as I think what straight couples do is wrong. I don't think people should have sex outside of marriage, regardless who you're scrumping with. I can't hold their feelings against them -- it's the same thing girls feel. And I can really sympathize with gay girls. They're all still people."
Anyoneofus: "That actually makes a lot of sense."
Me: "I'm a 20 year old virgin. Living proof that it can be done. You're not going to die without sex, and in the end, it'll mean more if you MAKE it mean more. If you save yourself, how much more important is it when you do finally give it?"
Me: "I'm the sorta guy who gets a thrill out of a girl laying on his shoulder -- I'll stick to the clean sort of enjoyment, thank you."
Me: "It's not about sex. It's about affection. It's about those little things, like holding hands, that no one ever thinks about. Those are the things that really matter, and without them... it doesn't even make much sense.
Just a few quotes and comments, mostly things which I felt said something about me.
A lot of it you probably already know, but the conversation was worth recording -- sadly, like a stupid with which I am, I closed Trillian before saving the IM. Damnable.
Me: "I think a girlfriend should pretty much just be a best friend who lets you kiss her. That's about it."
Anyoneofus: "That sounds like a friend with benefits to me."
Me: "-shrugs- There's little difference, I think. One has a title."
Anyoneofus: "I'm a firm believer in the "you don't shit in your own backyard." You don't want to lose a friend, but eventually you will lose a girlfriend."
Me: "Yeah, that's something I'm afraid of with Claire and I. So far it hasn't happened yet. -phew-"
Me: You shouldn't ever feel forced into or out of a relationship -- it's spposed to be a comfort and a support, not a worry. You know what I mean? You should never be afraid of your relationship. Or something.
Anyoneofus: I just enjoy giving people pleasure. that's what it comes down to, really.
Me: I like giving people support. Mental, material, emotional -- I'm not a big physical-kinda guy, but sometimes it's the best way to express my affection.
Anyoneofus: "There has to be a lot of emotion there. Otherwise I'll just be lured away."
Me: "I'm a big ball of emotion. I'm really just looking for an outlet. In my experience, no one wants my affection."
Me: "When I say 'what gay men do is wrong,' I only mean it the same way as I think what straight couples do is wrong. I don't think people should have sex outside of marriage, regardless who you're scrumping with. I can't hold their feelings against them -- it's the same thing girls feel. And I can really sympathize with gay girls. They're all still people."
Anyoneofus: "That actually makes a lot of sense."
Me: "I'm a 20 year old virgin. Living proof that it can be done. You're not going to die without sex, and in the end, it'll mean more if you MAKE it mean more. If you save yourself, how much more important is it when you do finally give it?"
Me: "I'm the sorta guy who gets a thrill out of a girl laying on his shoulder -- I'll stick to the clean sort of enjoyment, thank you."
Me: "It's not about sex. It's about affection. It's about those little things, like holding hands, that no one ever thinks about. Those are the things that really matter, and without them... it doesn't even make much sense.
"i try not to listen but i hear you..."
Exactly. In fact, when Beth came to visit me, that was one of the things I liked most about her being here. And the funny thing is that most people would never say something like that. It wouldn't stick with them. But with me it did. In fact, there were lots of things that I got out of that ... that would never have come any other way.
In the end it's always the little things that speak to you more often and more strongly in positive ways. A person could have a million experiences and yet they would always find their way back to a smile, a laugh, or a simple touch of someone's hand.
It's interesting because when I think about it, that lack of actual sex is what made Mulder and Scully so amazing to me. They had the soulmate relationship. The ultimate, the perfect, the one that would beat all else. They would die for each other. They couldn't imagine themselves with anyone else. They were IT for each other. Sex was an idea that ... well, should stay an idea. As much as I loved them together (and I do love them together) .. I want them together as soulmates. Partners in love and trust and a million other things. And when you reach that level with someone, sex seems like... ::shakes head:: Like it's not enough, like it's not worthy of that amazing connection. Like it taints it, somehow.
Which sounds really weird to explain - maybe it's just my reading it wrong because I'm so tired. But anyway. Yeah. We've touched on this subject before... so you know what I mean. ::nods:: Must go lay down to die now, before I say something that sounds even more insane, right?
'night!
Let's talk about sex.
i'm gonna sing the doom song now! doom dooooooom!
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honestly...why has sex become so demeaning and not-special, for lack of a better description? Even though i'm not sure I'm going to get married, I am DEFINITELY going to save myself for if I do.
just thought i'd say THANK YOU FOR MAKING ME FEEL LESS ALONE IN MY VALUING THE SACREDNESS OF SEX IN A RELATIONSHIP.
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1) i love, admire, respect everything you all are saying <3
2) i completely realize that im WAY younger than all of you but i've known forever and promised myself that i was going to save myself until marriage and seeing all of the things you said above only reasured that standpoint so, thanks!...again, i realize how insignificant that is at my age and level of "experience" but...hey, whatever.
3) whoever you are "dreamingaloud", i just adored your comparison and agreed with it completely! (i also must say i agree with her thoughts on you with kids andrew...::giggle:: its just precious!)
again...thanks and sorry!
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Have you ever noticed I can be long-winded at times...?
Re: Have you ever noticed I can be long-winded at times...?
I Like Pickled Beets
I like... uhm... circus peanuts? No, really, I like marshmellows. ^___^
I actually lied. I don't like pickled beets. I DO like Pickled cauliflowers, though.
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