Lemons, lemonade , that sort of thing.

So prester_scott poited out This Article about some muslim religious leaders who are suin US Airways, Minneapolis Metropolitan Airports Commission, and yet-to-be-determined John Doe airline passengers.

There's a lot to be angry about concerning that suit. A lot. Frankly, I'm too exhausted to want to think about it very much at all; I don't have the energy. But there was one bit in the whole article that struck me as really encouraging. Near the bottom, another Muslim group is quoted as saying that not all Muslims support this planned action. Which is itself a 'duh' statement, but it was *how* they said it that gladdened me a bit. In particular:

We will not accept the victimization agenda of organizations like CAIR. Lawsuits like the one announced today exploit the climate of political correctness and at the end of the day are harmful to the Muslim minority in America.

I can't stand the whole 'victim' mentality that's all-too-present in our society, and it's heartening to have some one acknowledge when this or that action is just taking advantage of an over-done political correctness.

Tears of a clown.

So, sometimes I think there's a lot more going on inside my head than I'm aware of. Scratch that; I always think there's a lot more going on inside my head than I'm aware of, but sometimes it strikes my particularly hard.

I'm feeling down again. And by 'again' I don't mean since the last time I mentioned it on here. I mean it's probably been a solid week now -- with a possible exception on the days when I had great breakthroughs in my work -- but a long stretch of time when I would just feel really heartbroken at night. Which isn't itself anything new, I get heartbroken at night, but it's just been more persistent lately. It's not really anything in particular. I just feel so sad. Lonely.

Being in Virginia was good for me. I got to see Leslie regularly for the first time in years, and while we don't always get along like proverbial peas, she's one of my dearest friends. I also got to see Louis again, and talk to Jesse who I think I like a lot more than shows. I'm always sorry she and I aren't better friends. Not to mention seeing my family nearly every week... It was good being back there.

Things aren't all bad here in California. I'm making more friends down at the card shop, which is cool, and I keep getting praised at school for, I donno, being smart or something. And that's nice. But... It's just different, I guess. I don't see Laurel much any more, not that I blame her. She's got a lot more going on in her life now, school and a boyfriend among other things. Fridays are the highlight of my week because that's when we have Drafts at the card shop -- but it's just (just) the playing Magic, it's seeing everyone. During the week, everything's kind of a blur, trudging from school to home and back again, pretty much keeping to my self. And at the end of the week, I'm just to exhausted, in every sense of the word, for much of anything.

I've been getting headaches, too. I think it's stress. There are a lot of things for me to stress out about. Not grades, really; I never stress about grades (consciously), and this quarter I'm doing so well there's no reason to worry subconsciously, either. I basically just have to complete my last three assignments and I'm assured a good grade. My thesis worries me. I have six months -- six months -- to research and write my thesis, and I don't even really know what it's supposed to be ON. Maybe I'm missing something, maybe it really is as simple as telling them what my thesis is on, but I don't know. (And yes, I know that's generally how it's done in most cases; mine is not most cases, and my thesis was pretty much given to me, it just feels like they haven't given me all of it...)

And then there are things I shouldn't even be thinking about at all because they're so... silly or stupid or out-in-the-future, or there's nothing I can do about them anyways, or... It's stupid.

Anyways. I'm way over-due for sleep. I was ready for bed at 7:00. That was four hours ago. I'm going to go put it off for another hour and then crawl in bed.

I just want to forget about the world for a while right now, and I'm having a very hard time doing that.

I don't like being alone when I'm sad.