John Noble (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
jackofallgeeks) wrote2004-07-15 02:30 pm
jackofallgeeks) wrote2004-07-15 02:30 pm
Someone Else...
So, I was going over my old entries -- I do that now and again to unlock past entries, as with time things need to be guarded less and less closely -- and I found Something that really scared me.
My temper is a Thing of Legend, spoken of in hushed tones but rarely seen. At least, that's how I tend to look at it. I don't think I really get very angry that easily (though I could be wrong), and often I just sit and smolder rather than erupt. In this case, though, I was in a bad mood trying to deal with a self-inflicted breakup. I'd gone to Amanda, presumably, for support, and she bit at me, hitting a nerve, and... I don't like getting angry, I don't like losing myself in a rage, and I don't think I've ever been that mad, before or since.
At one point she and I had a pretty deep friendship. After this argument, though maybe even a bit before, our relationship started to deteriorate. We stopped talking not much further down the road, and I haven't heard from her in months, easily. I'm quite sure it was still 2003 the last time we talked.
I just emailed Amanda, saying how I felt bad about where things had fallen and I wanted to get back in touch again. Cause it's the truth.
And, as a note to all who read this -- I highly suggest you go back and read my older entries. They're almost all open (I don't think ANYTHING is locked until mid-2002, and even then it's mostly just at the Friends level), and though I've certainly grown since November of 2001, you may get a better idea of who I am by seeing where I've been. And my whole point for this thing is that people might get to know me.
-shugs- A guy can dream.
My temper is a Thing of Legend, spoken of in hushed tones but rarely seen. At least, that's how I tend to look at it. I don't think I really get very angry that easily (though I could be wrong), and often I just sit and smolder rather than erupt. In this case, though, I was in a bad mood trying to deal with a self-inflicted breakup. I'd gone to Amanda, presumably, for support, and she bit at me, hitting a nerve, and... I don't like getting angry, I don't like losing myself in a rage, and I don't think I've ever been that mad, before or since.
At one point she and I had a pretty deep friendship. After this argument, though maybe even a bit before, our relationship started to deteriorate. We stopped talking not much further down the road, and I haven't heard from her in months, easily. I'm quite sure it was still 2003 the last time we talked.
I just emailed Amanda, saying how I felt bad about where things had fallen and I wanted to get back in touch again. Cause it's the truth.
And, as a note to all who read this -- I highly suggest you go back and read my older entries. They're almost all open (I don't think ANYTHING is locked until mid-2002, and even then it's mostly just at the Friends level), and though I've certainly grown since November of 2001, you may get a better idea of who I am by seeing where I've been. And my whole point for this thing is that people might get to know me.
-shugs- A guy can dream.
no subject
Thanks for the words of encouragement, though; s'good to hear. And I kinda hope we can get things worked out, too. S'why I sent the email, after all.