Nerd Manifesto (Yoinked from koshnaranek98)

[jackofallgeeks]

I am a Nerd.

I am a dork, a dweeb, a spaz, a brain, a geek, a weirdo, a loser, a loner, an oddball, and an egghead.

I believe that C:\DOS...C:\DOS RUN...RUN DOS RUN, is funny.
I believe that reality TV is worse than the Black Death.
I believe that Extra-Credit is mandatory.
I believe that Lord of the Rings was the best movie in history.
I believe that being dumb is worse than being unpopular.
I believe that the government has no right to regulate software companies.
I believe that the RIAA should fornicate themselves with a spiked iron rod.
I believe that it is better to be l33t than a n00b.
I believe that people who do not understand how to use a computer should be pitied.
I believe that the Geek shall inherit the earth.

I will not succumb to the public desire to hold physical prowess in higher regard than intellectual ability.
I will not wear what TV tells me is in fashion.
I will not binge drink for the sake of having an excuse to act like a jackass.
I will not watch a movie simply for the sheer level of breast content.
I will not be closed minded to others simply because they are different.

I will join the chess club, debate team, or computer club.
I will own a set of dice with more than six sides.
I will watch Star Trek, Star Wars, Babylon 5, or Farscape.
I will go to a movie premiere dressed as a Hobbit, Klingon, or Jedi.
I will play Dungeons and Dragons, Whitewolf, or Ravenloft.
I will build my own computer with more processing power than the Space Shuttle.
I will watch the Discovery Channel, the Learning Channel, or the NASA Channel.
I will own Magic Cards, Yugio Cards, or Pokemon Cards.
I will own a Gamecube, PS2, or X-Box.
I will play FPS's online.
I will program games into my calculator.
I will watch Anime and read Manga.
I will keep a Weblog, Livejournal, or Online Diary.
I will wear whatever the hell I want.
I will make more money than the rest of you.
I will be more successful in life.
I will be a better person.

I am a Nerd, and this is my manifesto.

Comments

[timv.livejournal.com]

That's actually pretty funny/good/accurate. :)

[jackofallgeeks.livejournal.com]

S'not mine, really. I yoinked it off of Zach (http://www.livejournal.com/users/koshnaranek98/6397.html), and judging by the fact that he would never voluntarily mention Yugioh or pokemon cards in a possitive way, I guess he yoinked it from someone else. So I'm just perpetuating it.

Though "fornicate themselves with a spiked iron rod" does sound like something he'd say...

[tzohekiti.livejournal.com]

uh... accualy it is his original thoughts/mind/doing... :-p

[jackofallgeeks.livejournal.com]

-laughs- I stand corrected! Go Zach!

[timv.livejournal.com]

judging by the fact that he would never voluntarily mention Yugioh or pokemon cards in a possitive way
haha

[otakulk.livejournal.com]

darn, I was with you until the I wills... I guess I am just a geek.

[surichan.livejournal.com]

To the best of my knowledge, one must fornicate with something, not simply fornicate something.

[jackofallgeeks.livejournal.com]

Which would be why it says "fornicate themselves with a spiked iron rod." Perhapse if you replaced 'fornicate' with the more-vulgar 'fuck,' it'll make more sense to you.

[surichan.livejournal.com]

No, no. Trust me, my knowledge of English is not such that I need to replace "fornicate" with a vulgar verb for the sole purpose of understanding a sentence like that.

One fornicates with something. As in, with their lover. One cannot fornicate themselves - they'd have to say fornicate with themselves...and, to add the spiked iron rod, they'd be fornicating with themselves, aided by a spiked iron rod.

Point is, it's ridiculous to use the word "fornicate" in that sentence. "Fornication" is sex between two people who are unmarried. Whoever wrote that sentence should've picked a better "smart"-sounding verb to use, because "fornicate" is improperly used both gramatically and in meaning.

[jackofallgeeks.livejournal.com]

-nods- Point well made.
I suppose you're right.

*Rolls Eyes*

[koshnaranek98.livejournal.com]

Language in of itself is a metaphor for expressing our thoughts. Even though over the ages rules have arisen for a standardization of written language...the basic principle of language is to express thought. ERGO...if you got what I mean, specificly that the RIAA should shove a large rusty pole with metal spikes, up their ass, then whether or not my usage of the word fornicate was "correct" is irrelevant. And techincally that penetration would be fornication as, both the RIAA and the pole are abstract representations which could very well be represented as man and woman who are not married. Therefore the RIAA fornicating themselves with an iron rod would be consentual coitus with two unmarried parties.

YAY!

[tzohekiti.livejournal.com]

You're using the icon I made for you!!! ^_^ *giggles*

...after reading your comment....

[tzohekiti.livejournal.com]

>.< wow... dram.... trying to be abraisive much? o.O

[surichan.livejournal.com]

Oh, I got what you meant, all right. I just think that perhaps "masturbate" is the better word in this instance, seeing as how the RIAA is doing to themselves with an inanimate object. This may simply be my opinion, but the use of correct words in a given situation is never irrelevant. Also...I'm not entirely certain that anybody would consent to having a rusty pole with metal spikes up their ass. ::grins:: Once more, simply my opinion. I have a rather less-than-complete knowledge of how far some masochists will take things.

I apologize if my previous comment insulted you in some way, but I've got qualms with that sentence. I really don't mean anything incendiary by it, though. I do understand the point of the sentence, and I know I'm being a little too anal for the room. Therefore, I'm done here.